So here’s some good news from last week — a new study came out vindicating chumps everywhere.
Psychologists asked over 5,000 women chumps about their relationship break-ups. Turns out the chumps fixed their pickers, learned from the experience, and had better future relationships. They also experienced more personal growth outside their relationships.
And karma bonus — the Other Woman who “won” the cheater? They turn out to be the losers.
The study, led by Dr Craig Morris, an evolutionary biologist at Binghamton University in New York in conjunction with University College London, explored the experience of 5,705 women in 96 countries — and is the largest study ever on relationship dissolution.
Our thesis is that the woman who “loses” her mate to another woman will go through a period of post-relationship grief and betrayal, but come out of the experience with higher mating intelligence that allows her to better detect cues in future mates that may indicate low mate value.
‘Hence, in the long-term, she “wins”. The “other woman”, conversely, is now in a relationship with a partner who has a demonstrated history of deception and, likely, infidelity.
‘Thus, in the long-term, she “loses”.’
The study, published in the Oxford Handbook of Women and Competition, also explored the dynamics of the pick-me dance and concluded that it sucked.
‘Typically psychological and relational in nature, this competition may be no less damaging than physical violence more commonly used between males.”
In short, “winning” cheaters leads to crappy outcomes. (Have at it, Becky!) Gaining a life without cheaters leads to greater wisdom, happiness, and relationship success.
Thank you, Science!